the truth

i've been putting on a happy face. shopping for gifts, baking goodies, and delivering presents all while inside i want to scream. today i broke. i was running my final errands and in a rush, forgot the one item i went to that specific store to get. with all the dinners, parties, get-togethers and what-not that surrounds this time of year i was limited on my time. instead i was forced to drag two kids, one sleeping & the other sleepy, to the store to pick up the Christmas cards that will not arrive before Christmas and all the food or treats we've "volunteered" to bring to the festivities this weekend. my hubby just got an earful because i'm DONE! i haven't felt the spirit of the season this year. i haven't done anything for ME this year. i really just wanted to see the lights at temple square. we've been downtown twice, but both times we've rushed to return home. my kids can sense the tension i'm carrying around and are not helping the situation, but they are not to be blamed. i haven't had time to take Savanna to see Santa this year. instead, she met "father Christmas" at my friends, mother's work. got that? the only lights she's seen are the ones from the car window as we rush home after a frantic day of NOTHING! or at least that's how i feel when it's over. i have a closet full of presents to wrap including those items from my list that require a certain size or color. one of these days i will update this blog with all the happenings and memories i want to remember and record for my blog book. until then, i will be praying for life to slow down enough that i can enjoy it and if it doesn't i'll make myself a vinyl quote to put on my bathroom mirror that reads: what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. thanks for listening {reading}. don't worry, i'm off to pour myself a diet coke and watch something christmas-like on tv. later i will wrap all those presents, hopefully while listening to the Christmas devotional i missed. Merry friggin' Christmas.